Spider-Man, Loneliness, and the Power of Being Known

SPOILER ALERT: This article contains spoilers for Spider-Man: Brand New Day.

Have you ever felt alone, even in a crowded room?

​At the end of Spider-Man: No Way Home, Peter Parker made the heart-wrenching decision to let the world forget him to protect those he loved. Four years later, while Spider-Man is a public hero receiving the Key to the City, Peter Parker is struggling in deep isolation. 

This loneliness is not just an emotional burden, though. It’s a physical and psychological threat that forms the central conflict of Spider-Man: Brand New Day. 

The film visually and audibly underscores Peter’s emptiness. During the opening Marvel Studios logo, Peter has been removed from various MCU scenes. The theme music is also missing notes from the original Homecoming score, signaling that something vital is missing from his life. 

As we open on Peter, he is hanging upside down over New York City, watching online videos of his former friends, Ned and MJ. He believes it’s now his responsibility to live alone with the truth of who he is in order to keep others safe.

However, Peter’s isolation causes his spider side to overpower his human side. The stress from his lack of community triggers his evolving arachnid DNA to take over, leading to physical ailments like frequent headaches and, more alarmingly, a violent rage.

In his desperation, Peter invents an inhibitor to suppress his powers. He’s even warned that this device could ironically take away the very things that make a person unique, or as I would put it, human.

While many might question the existence of other MCU characters in this movie, I feel they were much more than cameos. Each of them had a parallel story to Peter where they struggled with loneliness at some point, and they all stand as an example of what the lack of community will do to someone, even a superhero.

• Frank Castle (The Punisher): His isolation has turned him into a cold judge, jury, and executioner who no longer cares for the rights of others. He serves as a cautionary tale and a warning for Peter to not descend down the same dark path.
• Bruce Banner (Hulk): Ever since his gamma radiation incident years ago, he has struggled with anger that has often isolated him. He even created an inhibitor to suppress his transformation, allowing him to be a college professor in this movie.
• Yelena Belova (Black Widow): While it seems she is in a good place in this film, she was struggling not long ago. After losing her sister and leaving the life she once knew, we see in Thunderbolts* that she wrestled with a “void” of depression and the lack of community.
• Jean Grey: Dealing with the trauma of losing her sister, her powers also flare out of control when triggered by anger and loneliness, and her story becomes the pivotal comparison to Peter in the movie.

The turning point for Peter comes from a shift in how he perceives his responsibility. Peter begins to reclaim his humanity through vulnerability, which is on display when Peter allows Jean Grey into his mind. 

While he initially believes he must be alone to protect others, this journey into Peter’s memories allows him to see and hear a clear message from his Aunt May. She tells him that while he is special, he is loved not for his powers, but for who he is. She identifies that his deepest responsibility is never forgetting that he is loved, even when he feels totally alone.

This also becomes a moment of connection between Peter and Jean that shows both of them that they’re not alone. This human connection then leads to a moment of ultimate sacrifice when Peter steps in front of a sniper bullet meant for Jean, proving that his love for others is more powerful than his instinct for self-preservation. 

The film concludes that connection is essential for survival. Jean uses her powers to keep Peter alive after he is shot, and even Frank finds a sense of belonging by holding vigil at Peter’s bedside and helping him escape the hospital.

In an interview with Brandon Davis, Director Destin Daniel Cretton notes that while Peter starts the film believing he is destined to be alone, he and the audience must realize “we can very easily start to go a bit crazy when we isolate ourselves.” 

By the end of the movie, Peter stands in the same spot overlooking New York, but he is no longer lonely. He understands that being Spider-Man does not mean abandoning Peter Parker. Rather, he must embrace both sides of his identity through the strength of community.

We all need community. We were made for it. During the creation account in Genesis after God created Adam, He said, “It is not good for the man to be alone” (Genesis 2:18b, NIV). From that point on, we see throughout the Bible and in our own lives that we thrive when we are connected to others. 

Even though Spider-Man is a fictional character, the effects of isolation and loneliness are very real. Medical research demonstrates it can impact a person physically and mentally. Similarly, studies also prove that community can often improve our physical and mental status.

You can tell this makes a huge impact on Peter as well. In one scene, he gets to hang out as Spider-Man with Ned and MJ, playing with LEGO and sharing stories. You can see his joy, even through the mask, as he is completely relaxed and doesn’t struggle at all with his headaches. He even tells them that he’s not had that much fun in a while.

By the end of the movie, Peter realizes that even though associating with others might risk putting them in danger, he finds himself walking up to Ned and initiating their secret handshake, showing that he now understands he doesn’t have to be alone. His life is better with others in it.

Your life is better with others in it. We were made to be in community.

If you feel alone, please find someone to reach out to. Those of us at Love Thy Nerd think you are incredibly valuable. And as we say, “Our focus is on building lasting, meaningful friendships, and equipping others with the skills and resources to do the same.” So please let us help you in finding community and becoming all you were created to be.